About Face

Several months after my sister passed away we were going through her things when I stumbled upon a precious notebook.  The cover was marked "Road Trip with Mel."  You see, just 7 months before her passing we went on an amazing trip together.  I was living in Oklahoma at the time and she drove out so that we could then take a trip to the Grand Canyon, the Hoover Dam and Las Vegas.  Excited to find something so special, I carefully opened to the first page.  She had detailed notes about when we stopped at different places, the time and even what we ate.  My heart was so happy to relive  the memories we had made.  I kept thumbing through the pages when my eyes landed upon six words that would forever get my attention.  "Melissa is so selfish and grumpy."  I froze as I read them again hoping I had accidentally missed the "fun to be around" and "always there to lend a helping hand" part of my description.

Nope.  Nada.  "Melissa is so selfish and grumpy" seemed to leap off the page much like an SOS call.

My heart sank as I realized that I had hurt my sister without even knowing it.  She went on to describe my actions behind her statement.  I had become upset when we weren't able to listen to a CD I wanted to listen to and then even more upset when Vicky wanted to stop at a souvenir shop and I didn't.  I mean....really???!!!  Truthfully, I didn't remember making such a fuss about it, but it sure sounded like I was a toddler stuck in a 20 something body.   The tears flowed.  I stood there for what seemed like forever rereading the sentence.  I couldn't do anything about it.  I realized that I couldn't apologize to her, but I could start looking at my actions and how I was actually treating others.  I could become a student of myself......and you know what happened?  I learned a lot.  I had some really selfish parts.  Some hurtful parts that I am still to this day weeding out by God's grace.

I was always a very good student of everyone else.  I saw their flaws and nuances yet was blind to my own most of the time.  I have learned that the people I love to be around the most are self-aware-about-face kind of people.  They are humble.  They forgive and encourage.  They desire to weed out the natural born tendencies to be selfish that will be a forever learning process for us all.

So, take care of the people who are in your life.  Think before you speak.  Ask for forgiveness when you mess up.  About Face! 

Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.

Philippians 2:3-4