Look Again

One of my students enters the classroom, puts down his breakfast that he has to eat at school because his parents (who are no longer married, hate each other and keep him in the middle) don't have enough money to provide it at home.  This same student approached me with his head hanging down and I realize that good news is not about to come.  "I didn't do my homework, Mrs. Lawrence."  My immediate reaction is frustration.  This is what seems like the 3,403,412 time he hasn't done his homework so far this year.  I want to say sternly, "What's wrong? How come you aren't able to complete your homework day after day?! Don't you know that you are being irresponsible and that irresponsible habits just lead to more irresponsibility?!" But instead a voice in me whispers..he doesn't need your judgement. He doesn't need your criticism.  He needs your love and understanding.  My heart feels heavy and at that moment  I remember what one of my professors told me....

When a child enters your room in the morning they are all carrying a certain set of "chips." She likens it to a game of poker.  Some enter with a full bucket ready to "go all in" and are able to handle whatever comes their way.  Others enter with no chips.  Their parents, if they are able to live with them, might have ignored them.  Someone might have taken what little chips they may have had by an irresponsible comment or remark about them.  Or, maybe their chips were taken..... by the fact that they don't have any food at home, or their clothes aren't clean and they worry about other kids noticing.  

That morning, this particular student was lacking chips.  When I stopped to look again, I noticed his face that had a smear of dirt on its right cheek.  His mom or dad (depending on whose week it was) must not have even noticed. If they did, surely they would have helped to wipe it clean, right?   My second look saw eyes that already felt bad enough about the irresponsibility.  On third glance, I noticed my own choice.  I looked him in the eye and told him that there would be a consequence, but that I believed that, despite him not doing his homework today, I still believed in him.  Mercy.  As he left for home later that day I pulled him aside and told him again that I believed he could do it.  We brainstormed ways that would help him be successful at completing his homework.  Encouragement.  

My perspective is what will add or take chips from the people in my life.  Now, I am in no way making excuses for this little one in not doing his homework.  I am simply saying that I needed to get off of my, for lack of better analogy, "high horse" and love.  Love him despite his homework lacking.  Love him because he needs some chips added to his life so that he has a chance of success.  More chips.  Seems simple, but hard for most.  How many people in your life are operating on a chip deficit?  The next time someone fails to meet your expectations.  Step back. Look again. And love despite.  You just might add some chips to their life so that the next person they cross paths with will reap the benefits.  

Dwellers Anonymous...Errrr.

 I have always been a dweller...call it daydreaming, worrying, analyzing, critiquing...my mind is ALWAYS thinking.  I love when people give the actual dictionary definition of a word.  According to my lazy dictionary reference (thank you dictionary.com). Dwell means to.... to linger over, emphasize, or ponder in thought, speech, or writing. 


I dwell...in happy places, uncomfortable places...you get it.  Today I felt God nudge me.  Look at the word Dwell... within that word is 'well.'  Being a teacher I absolutely love words, words within words, yea, grade A dork.  Anyway.  'Well' is one of those beautiful multiple meaning words.  When you are in a 'well' you are deep, down in a dark place... Yet when you are 'well' in body you are full of health.  So dWELLing can take two forms you see.  God is challenging me to dwell to get well and not to stay in the depths of the dark places.  Each thought is a choice.  How well do you dwell?


Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Philippians 4:8